Ye ken yoo're in scootlund when

Saturday, 16 June 2012

King's Cross - Waiting for the Platform numbers
to be posted on the Board

Friday, our final morning in London, greeted us with the ripe stench of two-plus weeks of laundry. We are soooo ready to move away from big city traffic, subways, and sirens; to lose the "Urban" from Explorers. We didn't sit still for two weeks, covering 5 - 7 miles a day on foot. We notched the big stair climbs - Eiffel Tower and St. Paul's Cathedral. Finding the unexpected adventure around the corner, great, but we're toast. A 4.5 hour train ride sounds perfect.

On the Potter Trail - King's Cross Station

King's Cross was good for another stop on the Harry Potter Quest side of our trip. Since the first movie, a marker on the train platforms existed for 9 3/4 with a luggage cart half absorbed into the wall. A massive makeover of King's Cross, necessitated the portal to board Hogwarts Express be moved. I expect moving a Wizards's Platfrom must be quite simple really. It's just a portal to another place right? So, in the event you missed the memo, the portal into platfrom 9 3/4 is now located in the main station at King's Cross, not on the platforms.

The ride to Edinburgh Waverly has enough stops you notice the train's passenger mix turnover. "English" is prominent until about Newcastle-upon-Tyne. By Berwick-upon-Tweed, well, Ye cannae kin th' sassenach speakers next tae ye oan th' train (You can't understand the English speakers next to you on the train).

Rain greeted us at the station in Edinburgh. Saturday the wind pushed the rain sideways all day causing us to declare it a laundry day. So, on the 16th day, we rested and did laundry. Tired legs and Laura's achilles all cheered.

Between loads of laundry, I landed on a few tell tale indicators to aide travelers in answering their kids constant question: "Are we in Scotland yet?"

Ye ken yoo've crossed frae london tae scootlund when (You know you've crossed from London to Scotland when)...

• It's the tough lookin' stock that wear skirts and a purse.
• Food is half the price and twice as good.
• Service: "Yes!"
• Did we mention, people are nice?
• "Pie" is on the dessert menu, "Tarte" is out
• "Set Down" is where taxis drop off.
• Taxi drivers don't know when England plays their next match
• It's daylight when you enter, and leave, the Pub.
• Most people don't bother with umbrellas.
• Tipping is not expected.

As the taxi driver from Edinburgh Station to the hotel couldn't answer a question I assumed to be a given in any Football crazy "United Kingdom," I started to wonder how the Scots really feel about the English. It's been a good 300+ years since they agreed to ally, but if the Taxi driver doesn't know when England plays in the Euro2012 tournament..... Football allegiances are a truth serum for real sentiment.

In that vein, I did a quick search...best Scotish quips on England I found so far...

A Scotsman walking through a field, sees a man drinking water from a pool with his hand. The Scotsman man shouts ' Awa ye feel hoor thatâs full Oâ coos Sharn' (Don't drink the water, it's full of cow sh!t.). The man shouts back 'I'm English, Speak English, I don't understand you'.
The Scotsman man shouts back 'Use both hands, you'll get more in.'

3 guys, 1 Irish, 1 English and 1 Scottish, are walking along the beach one day and come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total" says the Genie. The Irish guy says "I am a fisherman, my Dad's a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish for all eternity." So, with a blink of the Genie's eye "AlKaZoom" the oceans were teaming with fish. The English guy was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around England, protecting her, so that nothing will get in for all eternity". Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye "AlkaZoom - POOF" there was a huge wall around England. The Scot asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall. "The Genie explains "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick, protecting England so that nothing can get in or out." The Scot says, "Ach, fill it up with water."

Walking to dinner through a sideways rain that shredded the 5 Euro umbrellas we bought adjacent Notre Dame, I noticed the Pubs were full as the English played to a 3-2 victory over Sweden. It's likely the team wouldn't have been allowed back into the Kingdom had they lost after tying the French in their first match. Now, I don't know if the Pubs in Edinburgh would have been full without the match but, for now, we'll give the benefit of my ignorance and conclude, at least until furhter diligence is complete, that the Kingdom's allegiance of Scots and English is safe and QE2 (Queen Elizabeth II) may still vacation safely in Balmoral.